This bothers me evertime I watch certain episodes: The seemingly nonexistant clothing budget. And those of you who know me know that my issues frequently revolve around Renee (who would have guessed, huh?) From the "Ha ha" shirt in '86 that really was a joke, to '87's tribute to Catholic school wear, it's obvious that Richie wasn't the only person she should have clobbered.

Case in point? Episodes 76-78, the last 3 episodes of the 4th season. Now, while the pink sweater vest (one of many, sadly) wasn't so bad on it's own, pairing it with that army surplus tent not-so-cleverly disguised as a skirt was just too much for me to bear! And why was the pocket down past her knees? We'll never know. But the worst part about wearing a pink top with a green skirt was this: just 6 or 7 episodes earlier, GREEN top, PINK pants!!! Now, someone on that set was just a wee bit colorblind.

    Does anyone else see the problem with this?!?!?!  

Speaking of Renee and irritating things, let's move on to Richie, shall we? What little boy wears 3-piece suits?!??!?! He would have been terrorized in school! The poor gweeb was better off in the outfit he wore in the season premiere. What I want to know is, if the clothing budget was that bad, why didn't they just let them wear their own clothes? How I long for the early 80's, when they actually changed their clothes everyday like normal people.

I'm sure you've noticed that up until now, I've left out that season's fantasy sequences. That's because on the whole, they weren't actually that bad, except for the frightenly funny hillbilly outfits(open mouth, ram finger down throat), and that God-awful blood clot of a dress for the Queen of Hearts persona. And I'm not entirely positive, but I think they used one of those fake pregnancy stomachs, too. When Renee climbed onto the table, I held my breath (speaking of breath, good thing that song was dubbed, or Renee would have run out of hers chasing Connie around the table!). Was all that fat really necessary? Ryan, Riley, and The Kid seemed to get away with being just portly. And don't even get me started on the Tweedles (By the way, Stacy, how do you dee?)

Here, in list form so you don't have to put up with my ranting, are the rest of my garment grievances:

• The Kid's incredible shrinking hat. At one point, when he turned the right way, you could actually see the pins they used to keep it in place.
• Riley's endless parade of Hawaiian print shirts or shirts similar to that.

  

• Ryan wearing sneakers with a tuxedo on 2 separate occasions (although, if he still had those black Converse high-tops, they'd be worth a lot of money).
• I always hated Stacy's hula hoop sized earrings that nearly touched her shoulders. If they had gotten caught in her hair, it would have been really sad.
• And how could I possibly forget the performance outfits with shoulder pads? (Although they did distract you from the big hair)